Divorcing Quietly, Wealthy or Not

Posted by Steven D. Eversole | Nov 27, 2014 | 0 Comments

High-asset divorces are likely to make national headlines, but even average-income Americans can benefit from a “quiet divorce.”

Keeping your divorce private and handling disputes discretely can help prevent wreaking havoc on your children, extended family and your own personal life. With Facebook, Twitter and other social media accounts becoming more tempting sources to “air your grievances” after a divorce, keeping your divorce private is also a smart decision to protect your rights and achieve the best possible outcome in court or through negotiation and settlement.

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In recent months, we have seen the divorce scandal of the “Wolf of Wall Street” unfold. The case involves a 42-year-old top-level executive of health-care banking at Jefferies & Co. and his 38-year-old wife.According to reports, the wife has been publicly trashed husband and his colleagues, alleging routine abuse of alcohol, cocaine, mushrooms, Special-K and heroin. These allegation have the potential to bring down both her husband and the investment bank.

She also made embarrassing public statements indicating her husband urinated on himself at the office party, among other unmentionable acts. As the media frenzy over the case looms, the investment banker and associated colleagues have denied all of it. The head of the investment bank has taken a leave of absence following the loss of five major clients due to the accusations. The CEO and other bankers were also subject to random drug tests, which came back clean.

It may seem like just revenge for the soon-to-be-ex-wife. The problem is that because such accusations will likely harm her husband professionally, it will hinder his ability to pay substantial support to her and her children in the future.

Divorces can inevitably get messy. You're dealing with a storm of raw emotions, and it's tough to keep that in check.

While some seem to have nothing to hide when it comes to divorce, others have learned it is best to divorce quietly.

The lesson for average Americans should also be clear—aggressively attacking a spouse or working to damage the public perception of a spouse during divorce may only come back to hurt you. Damaging the image of your former spouse can impact your children, his or her professional capacities and ability to pay support, as well as the courts perception of your own integrity.

Some wealthy spouses have even learned the hard way that airing grievances so substantially damages a career that it could result in a significant loss of income. In short, causing professional damage to the breadwinner is akin to “cutting off your nose to spite your face.”

As with any marriage, it is likely that you hold secrets and personal information about your spouse. While some issues such as addiction or abuse, may be necessary to disclose to protect your safety or your children, most “gossipy” and personal information is left between the couple as a divorce is resolved, either through settlement and negotiation, or at trial.

Our Birmingham divorce attorneys are committed to protecting the rights of clients from every walk of life. Whether you have significant income and significant assets, or you are middle class, in debt, or struggling to keep your family home, we can help. When making the decision to divorce, or entering in the divorce process, protect yourself and the future of your family by treating your relationship and marriage, as well as its dissolution, with discretion.

If you are seeking a divorce in Birmingham, contact Family Law Attorney Steven Eversole at (866) 831-5292.

About the Author

Steven D. Eversole

J.D., Samford University's Cumberland School of Law, Birmingham, Alabama B.A., University of Alabama, Tuscaloosa, Alabama

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